Really trying hard to look on the bright side today. Got up early to get my hair done, it was an hour round trip, and the stylist didn’t bother to show up. Still grieving. Not sleeping well. Everything kinda sucks.
Seperating the Major Depressive Disorder from the grief is difficult. I find myself trying to snap out of this haze, but then I remember I lost a baby and grief is normal and a process that I should allow to run its course.
So I will stay in bed today and binge on Netflix. I won’t allow myself to feel guilty about it. This time, its ok to give in to the sadness.
I suppose the silver lining is that when I’m ready to start trying to conceive again I’ll be better at being healthy. Not that I wasn’t taking care of myself before, because I was being very health conscious. But I can be better at it. I have a goal and I can achieve it.
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